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☢Dan

☢17

ghosturie:

patrick-stumps:

ottermatopoeia:

mattniskanenseyebrows:

OCTOBER IS NEXT WEEK

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OCTOBER IS THIS WEEK
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OCTOBER IS TOMORROW

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I͔̟̠̻̽̋̌͋͌́̆T̶̠̖̙͙͈̐͂S̽ͥͣ̄̄̚͝ ͖̞̈́͗̄̿͐O̠̪̙͊ͯ͒͐͐̐̐Cͭ̃͛́T̍ͣ́ͮͩŎ̈́҉Ḅ̞ͦ̾̄͗̓͛͘E̸̥̩̦̝̲̊̉͋̅̋̒̿R̲̝͔̪̬͎̯̎̋

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Being sick in Elementary: Yay home from school chicken noodle soup and movies
Being sick in high school: OH MY GOSH I'M GOING TO MISS A MATH NOTE AND THEN GET BEHIND IN ENGLISH AND THEN I'LL HAVE LATE MARKS OFF MY PRESENTATION AND I HAVE TO GO TO SCHOOL BECAUSE I'M GOING TO FAIL EVERYTHING AND DIE ALONE UNEDUCATED AND OLD AND NOT KNOWING HOW TO GRAPH A PARABOLA
College: did I have class today

Anonymous said: What's the most illegal thing you ever did?

sephyerite:

almanzapedia:

At Stanford there was this Professor who was a total bitch and she taught British Literature, which was cool. Except she taught only her opinions of the books and it didn’t help me as a writer. I went to school to learn new things to improve my craft, not have someone else’s opinions carved onto my forehead.

So anyway, for our final project, she asked us to write a ten page paper on why the color symbolism in Othello was so significant. I did some research and it turned out that she did her entire graduate thesis on this very subject. I was mad. This wasn’t teaching, this was boosting her ego. SO I wrote a ten page essay on why color symbolism in Othello wasn’t significant, satirizing it to the point of no return, saying that her opinion was an opinion and shouldn’t be taken seriously.

SHe failed me, needless to say. So in retaliation, I responded by baking a batch of brownies laced with weed and laxatives and delivered them myself to the professor hours before her big graduation speech. I told her that it was a peace offering, my way of apologizing and asking if I could do anything to fix my grade.

She refused to fix my grade.

In the end, she shit herself on stage.

I didn’t regret it.

No mercy.

American Horror Story: Freak Show - Main Title

unamusedsloth:

NYPD escorting a raccoon out of a beauty salon

unamusedsloth:

NYPD escorting a raccoon out of a beauty salon

itscalledfashionlookitup:

today I discovered you can make billboards in rollercoaster tycoon 3

itscalledfashionlookitup:

today I discovered you can make billboards in rollercoaster tycoon 3

hamball1:

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                    fuck you

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vampirestump:

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     all text posts in october must be
              formatted like this

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It was in the fall when I realized the world I had known was forever doomed. I knew I was about to enter the gates of hell.

carry-on-my-wayward-butt:

videohall:

This guy plays the tune of Jason Mraz - “I’m Yours” using two Nokia Phone

this is so fucking relaxing